As I thought about my blog post "The Waiting List," I got to thinking of a few more things to add to it and how I felt that it was left unfinished. God was speaking to me about a few things that I feel need to be shared.
For starters, we all need to realize that the one we marry is not going to be perfect and fit everything we desire. What I failed to mention in my post is the fact that this list is meant to be the things that you will not compromise on, things that would be a deal breaker if your significant other did not fit those things.
I mentioned that the things on my list are things that I would not make an exception to. This was telling me that these are the most important things I am looking for. With that being said, I think it is also important that you make a list of things that are attractive to you and that you would like to find, but are not necessarily deal breakers. This will help guide you in finding someone who you can get along with and enjoy spending time with. It will give you an idea of the type of person you'd like to spend the rest of your life with.
For instance, you can put things on the list such as "likes playing board games" or "plays sports." These are things that you think would be nice if he/she enjoyed, but if they did not you would not be disappointed and could look past them. I am finding that these are good things to do when in a relationship, now that I'm in a relationship myself, and it helps you think more deeply about whether the other person is someone you enjoy spending time with because of who they are, rather than the fact that it is a person who says they like you just because they want to have a girlfriend/boyfriend.
Since I think dating should be something where there is the intention to determine whether marriage is for the couple or not, it is important that the couple is pursuing each other in a way that helps them determine whether that person could fit who they are looking for in a future spouse. Is this someone you, honestly, could spend the rest of your life with? Look past the feelings and think logically about it, asking yourself if the traits this person has align with what works for you.
God has someone special in mind and we have to wait in His PERFECT timing for everything to fall into place. Feelings can be a difficult thing to control when trying to determine whether the person you are dating is "the one" or not, because they make you feel happy around the person. While that can be a great thing, it is best not to let them overtake the relationship and begin to think more deeply about the character of the other person and whether that is what you are looking for in a spouse. This is why I highly, highly, encourage each and every unmarried person to create a list of things that will not be compromised in a relationship to help guide you into the relationship that God has meant for your life.
I hope you have found this to be encouraging and that it helps to finish off the last blog post that I feel was unfinished. I pray for all of you out there who are searching for that special someone and trying to determine what God's will for your life is. Be encouraged and blessed, my dear friends! :)
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